Includes tags: Conceit, Guilt/shame/inadequacy, Judgementalism, Perfectionism, Jealousy, Competitiveness, Selfishness, Self-pity
“It seems that suffering in the lives of many people, my own included, comes from feeling unworthy or unlovable. Would you have any thoughts on why so many people feel that way and what will help to let go of this feeling? Thank you!” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy ] // [Culture/West] [Christianity] [Goodwill] [Competitiveness]
2014 Thanksgiving Monastic Retreat, Session 5, Excerpt 6
“Please talk about fixed views and the nine conceits.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Views ] [Conceit ] // [Pāli] [Proliferation ] [Craving] [Self-identity view] [Cessation of Suffering] [Competitiveness] [Culture/West]
Teaching: The three papañcadhammas. [Conceit ]
Thanksgiving Retreat 2016, Session 3, Excerpt 6
“Would you have some suggestions on working with shame? As an emotion, it feels very “sticky” and probably the hardest one for me to work with. It seems like it is deeply rooted in my mind (probably thanks to Christianity). Is it true that Thai people have an easier time with it than westerners? Is an antidote to shame self-compassion?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy ] [Culture/Thailand] [Culture/West] [Compassion] // [Goodwill] [Self-identity view] [Relinquishment]
Thanksgiving Retreat 2016, Session 3, Excerpt 8
“What are the biggest misconceptions about being ordained?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Monastic life] // [Selfishness ]
Story: Ajahn Pasanno visits Ajahn Buddhadāsa: “Don’t be selfish!” [Ajahn Buddhadāsa] [Ajahn Pasanno] [Selfishness ]
“Competitiveness feels so pervasive here in America. What are your thoughts for working with it or healing it?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Competitiveness ] [Culture/West] // [Suffering] [Self-identity view] [Relinquishment] [History/America] [Proliferation]
Reflection: The nine bases of conceit. [Conceit] [Competitiveness ]
2015 Thanksgiving Monastic Retreat, Session 6, Excerpt 5
Quote: “Look at others 10% of the time and look at yourself 90%; that’s about the right measure.” — Ajahn Chah. Quoted by Jack Kornfield. [Ajahn Chah] [Judgementalism ] [Admonishment/feedback] [Discernment] // [Idealism] [Conventions] [Heart/mind] [Vinaya]
Story: Ajahn Chah’s teacher eats sloppily. [Teachers] [Food] [Suffering]
Remembering Ajahn Chah Weekend (2001), Session 26, Excerpt 17
“What is the best approach to deal with guilt?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy ] // [Culture/West] [Conscience and prudence] [Learning] [Faith] [Discernment] [Self-identity view] [Not-self] [Aggregates]
Sutta: MN 22.58: “Whatever is not yours, abandon it.”
10. Quote: “I feel incredibly indebted to Ajahn Chah.” — Ajahn Jitindriyā [Gratitude] [Respect for elders] [Ajahn Chah] // [Cultural context] [Language] [Teaching Dhamma] [Goodwill] [Perfectionism]
4. Quote: “I think with any Westerner, we’re so full of ourselves when we go [to Asia]. We want to get enlightened....” — Ajahn Sumedho [Culture/West] [Conceit] [Liberation] [Ajahn Chah] [Ajahn Sumedho] // [Mentoring] [Respect for elders]
8. Ajahn Chah made me look at myself. Teaching by Ajahn Sumedho. [Teaching Dhamma] [Ajahn Chah] [Ajahn Sumedho ] // [Hearing the true Dhamma] [Posture/Sitting] [Pain] [Aversion] [Admonishment/feedback] [Humor] [Patience] [Goodwill] [Discernment] [Contentment] [Cessation] [Happiness] [Saṅgha] [Views] [Relinquishment]
Quote: “Your practice now is patience.” — Ajahn Chah
Story: Ajahn Chah chats for hours after Pāṭimokkha. [Idle chatter] [Judgementalism]
4. Story: When I met Ajahn Chah. Told by Ṭhānissarā. [Ṭhānissarā] [Ajahn Chah] // [Meditation retreats] [Ajahn Sumedho] [Personal presence] [Hearing the true Dhamma] [Liberation] [Happiness]
Story: Ajahn Chah bows to a small, neglected Buddha image in a secular meditation center and inspires Ṭhānissarā‘s faith. [Bowing] [Buddha images] [Perception of a samaṇa] [Human] [Faith]
Quote: “If you’ve been listening to this and you think this is good or you think this is bad, then you haven’t been listening properly.” — Ajahn Chah [Judgementalism] [Appropriate attention]
2. “My life has been hugely impacted by Ajahn Chah, his teachings, and the spiritual family he introduced me to.” Reflection by Kittisaro. [Gratitude] [Teaching Dhamma] [Saṅgha] [Ajahn Chah] // [Happiness] [Teachers] [Learning] [Respect for elders] [Meditation retreats] [Body scanning] [Conceit] [Ajahn Sumedho] [Goodwill] [Humility] [Mentoring]
Story: Ajahn Chah sniffs around like a dog. [Kittisaro] [Similes] [Humor] [Mindfulness of breathing]
Quote: “He gave me a practice path that goes on and on to this day.” [Eightfold Path]
2. “Did Ajahn Chah pass his teaching style to you or do you use your own separate style?” Answered by Ajahn Sumedho and Paul Breiter. [Personality] [Ajahn Chah] [Teaching Dhamma]
Story: Ajahn Sumedho, first abbot of Wat Pah Nanachat. Told by Ajahn Sumedho. [Ajahn Sumedho] [Abbot] [Wat Pah Nanachat ] [Sequence of training] [Culture/West] [Joseph Kappel] [Aversion] [Suffering] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Humor]
Quote: “The special thing about Luang Por Chah was that he was at ease and completely himself.” — Ajahn Sumedho [Contentment]
Response by Paul Breiter: “The elements are there, but different teachers are expressing them in a living way.”
2. Story: Ajahn Sumedho meets Jack Kornfield. Told by Ajahn Sumedho. [Jack Kornfield] [Ajahn Sumedho] [Ajahn Chah] // [Wat Pah Pong] [Insight Meditation Society] [Judgementalism]
Story: Ajahn Sumedho stays on Pupek Mountain. [Seclusion] [Suffering] [Aversion] [Sickness] [Self-pity] [Mindfulness of breathing] [Robes] [Humor] [Gratitude]
9. Story: Dump your money in the river. Told by Jack Kornfield. [Conceit] [Commerce/economics] [Fierce/direct teaching] [Truth] [Ajahn Chah] [Humor] // [Compassion]
17. Quote: “Look at others 10% of the time and look at yourself 90%; that’s about the right measure.” — Ajahn Chah. Quoted by Jack Kornfield. [Ajahn Chah] [Judgementalism ] [Admonishment/feedback] [Discernment] // [Idealism] [Conventions] [Heart/mind] [Vinaya]
Story: Ajahn Chah’s teacher eats sloppily. [Teachers] [Food] [Suffering]
23. What does not suffering mean? Reflection by Jack Kornfield. [Suffering] [Cessation of Suffering] [Ajahn Chah] // [Judgementalism] [Politics and society] [Discrimination] [Environment] [Discernment] [Compassion] [Human] [Buddha] [Proliferation] [Relinquishment]
Quote: “We human beings are constantly in combat, at war to escape the fact of being limited by so many circumstances that we can’t control...”” — Ajahn Chah [Conflict] [Characteristics of existence]
Quote: “Doubts are natural.” — Ajahn Chah [Doubt] [Naturalness] [Impermanence] [Not-self] [Liberation]
Quote: “The desire mind is like children.” — Ajahn Chah [Desire] [Similes]
Story: “Scary ride, wasn’t it?” [Jack Kornfield] [Thai Ajahn Chah monasteries] [Fear] [Death]
4. Stories: The Chipmunk Story and The Donkey Story. Told by Kittisaro. [Kittisaro] [Depression] [Humor ] [Similes] [Ajahn Chah] // [Recreation/leisure/sport] [Perfectionism] [Meditation] [Thai Ajahn Chah monasteries] [Sickness] [Animal] [Learning] [Health care] [Self-identity view] [Joseph Kappel] [Compassion] [Energy] [Right Effort] [Equanimity] [Lawfulness]
2. I was the first Westerner, so he gave me an enormous amout of attention for the first two or three years. Reflection by Ajahn Sumedho. [History/Western Buddhist monasticism] [Ajahn Sumedho] [Mentoring] [Ajahn Chah] // [Ajahn Mahā Amorn] [Other Thai Forest teachers] [Pāṭimokkha] [Conceit] [Paul Breiter] [Truth] [Compassion] [Humor]
Story: Venerable Varapañño chants the Pāṭimokkha better than Ajahn Sumedho. [Competitiveness] [Conceit] [Jealousy]
Note: The story that Ajahn Sumedho didn’t tell is probably told in Stillness Flowing by Ajahn Jayasaro, p. 189.
3. Comment: Even the monastic life can be competitive. [Monastic life] [Competitiveness] // [Posture/Sitting] [Wat Pah Nanachat] [Culture/West] [Conceit]
4. When I first went there, the town monks were very critical of Ajahn Chah. Reflection by Ajahn Sumedho. [Forest versus city monks] [Wat Pah Pong] [Aversion] [Ajahn Chah] // [Ajahn Sumedho] [Rains retreat] [Asking forgiveness ceremony] [Jealousy] [History/Thai Buddhism] [Thai sects] [Ajahn Mun]
1. Story: My experiences with Ajahn Chah. Told by Nan Meister. [Gratitude] [Faith] [Ajahn Chah] // [Ajahn Liem] [Suffering] [Commerce/economics] [Spiritual urgency] [Joseph Kappel] [Bowing] [Wat Pah Pong] [Mae Chee Kumfah] [Ajahn Pasanno] [Wat Pah Nanachat] [Mae Chee] [Ghost] [Conceit] [Fierce/direct teaching]
3. Reflection by Ajahn Sumedho: The convention is like a skeleton, but the life comes through the individuals. [Conventions] [Vinaya] [Theravāda] [Ajahn Chah] // [Ajahn Sumedho] [Judgementalism] [Compassion] [Goodwill] [Teachers] [Liberation] [Personality] [Ardency] [Continuity of mindfulness]
4. “As a guilt-ridden American, how do you respond to personal mistakes without guilt?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Culture/West] [Great disciples] // [Saṅgha] [Conscience and prudence] [Pāli] [Skillful qualities] [Self-identity view] [Respect] [Perception] [Virtue] [Buddha]
Story: A monk falsely accuses Sāriputta (AN 9.11). [Forgiveness]
5. “How would you describe the jhana states and do you teach this kind of meditation?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Jhāna] [Ajahn Pasanno] // [Concentration] [Energy] [Clear comprehension] [Knowledge and vision] [Ajahn Chah] [Relinquishment] [Craving] [Conceit]
6. “Please explain how to cultivate muditā. I’ve heard it described as ‘poor man’s happiness.’” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Empathetic joy] [Happiness] // [Divine Abidings] [Jealousy] [Selfishness]
14. “When doubt is mentioned under the hindrances, is it mainly referring to doubt about the Buddha’s teachings? Are there other implications?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Doubt] [Hindrances] [Dhamma] // [Everyday life] [Mindfulness of mind] [Investigation of states] [Mindfulness of body] [Suffering] [Perfectionism]
13. “Is attavādupādāna clinging to sakkāyadiṭṭhi?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Doctrine-of-self clinging] [Self-identity view] // [Fetters] [Stream entry] [Conceit] [Views]
3. “Reflecting on your 35 years in robes, do you have any strong lessons that stand out?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Pasanno] [Monastic life] [Long-term practice] [Discernment] // [Patience ] [Ajahn Chah] [Virtue] [Meditation retreats]
Quote: “Oftentimes we don’t really recognize the goodness that we’re doing.” [Perfectionism] [Judgementalism]
Quote: “Patience isn’t just enduring. It’s being able to be present with experience.” [Direct experience] [Present moment awareness]
2. Teaching by Ajahn Chah: Skillful effort in meditation. Read by Ajahn Pasanno. [Meditation/General advice] [Determination] [Right Effort] [Ajahn Chah] // [Conceit] [Posture/Sitting] [Relinquishment] [Equanimity] [Tranquility] [Mindfulness of breathing] [Restlessness and worry] [Clinging] [Craving] [Judgementalism]
Reference: Collected Teachings of Ajahn Chah, p. 467 “Unshakeable Peace”
3. Comment: Living on faith increases your potential anxiety level. I came to Buddhism thinking this would settle my life, but I realize that being open, aware, and sensitive to the world keeps bringing me new challenges. [Faith] [Restlessness and worry] [Everyday life] [Conscience and prudence] [Tudong]
Sutta: Dhp 244-245: Life is easy for for one without shame. [Conceit] [Virtue]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno: “You get more than what you bargained for.” [Happiness] [Culture/West] [Communal harmony] [Trust] [Concentration] [Ardency] [Energy] [Discernment] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Right Effort]
Sutta: AN 11.1: Virtue leads to non-remorse and samādhi.
4. “Can the practice be used in a punitative or punishing way?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] // [Culture/West] [Habits] [Clear comprehension] [Craving not to become]
Quote: “Having a human mind...it’s amazing how perverse it can be sometimes.” [Human] [Unwholesome Roots]
Story: Ajahn Pasanno can’t translate guilt into Thai. [Ajahn Pasanno] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Translation] [Culture/Thailand] [Suffering]
Quote: “All you need to do is create a cage of mindfulness around [unskillful habits].” — Ajahn Chah [Ajahn Chah] [Sense restraint] [Mindfulness] [Unskillful qualities] [Similes]
Follow-up: “What about letting the tiger go instead of keeping it in a cage?”
Follow-up: “What about the case when one feels one is the tiger trapped in a metaphorical cage. How to escape?” [Liberation] [Perception] [Self-identity view] [Spiritual friendship]
9. “I have an internal voice that’s concerned whether I’m doing it right; if I’m not doing it right, then I won’t get where I want to go. Is this delusion?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Eightfold Path] [Perfectionism] [Delusion] // [Suffering] [Fear] [Mindfulness of body] [Volitional formations]
19. Comment by Ajahn Yatiko: Right Livelihood isn’t about judging other people’s livelihood. [Judgementalism] [Right Livelihood]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno. [Eightfold Path] [Pāli] [Cessation of Suffering] [Happiness]
2. Comment: It’s not so easy to let go of people who have been in my life forever to cultivate new friendships. [Relinquishment] [Spiritual friendship]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno. [Judgementalism] [Virtue] [Ajahn Pasanno] [Views]
4. “If my sister has unwholesome friendships, how can I help her redirect these?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Family] [Spiritual friendship] // [Compassion] [Judgementalism] [Right Intention] [Right Speech] [Admonishment/feedback]
Story: An Abhayagiri monk skillfully conveys concerns to his father. [Abhayagiri]
3. “Can you give some suggestions on dealing with betrayal in relationships?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Relationships] [Sexual misconduct] [Trust] // [Spiritual friendship] [Faith] [Virtue] [Generosity] [Discernment] [Judgementalism] [Monastic life]
Sutta: Amaravati Chanting Book, p. 46: The Highest Blessings (Mangala Sutta, SN 2.4)
3. “How do we deal with the frustration that arises after repeatedly catching the busy mind?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Tranquility] [Proliferation] // [Perfectionism]
4. “Is there a state of the calm mind when you’re not thinking about anything or is meditation more about reflecting?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Directed thought and evaluation] [Recollection] [Tranquility ] [Proliferation] // [Concentration] [Restlessness and worry] [Perfectionism] [Ardency]
9. “In letting go of thoughts that habitually arise from negative self-criticism or from past trauma defenses, how do we ask these powerful mental states to not overwhelm our mindfulness?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Mindfulness]
6. “Can you please give perspective on thoughts/feelings of inadequacy and comparison to others?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy]
12. “Some monks have told me I’m selfish for being so focused on release. They say I should help others more. What are your thoughts?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Release] [Selfishness] [Generosity]
5. Comment: This reminds me of the phrase “possessing goodness.” [Self-identity view] [Virtue]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno: “The relinquishment doesn’t negate the need for cultivation of goodness.” [Conceit] [Right Effort] [Relinquishment]
8. Comment by Ajahn Ñāṇiko: Ajahn Chah’s brother didn’t have an inferiority complex. [Ajahn Chah] [Family] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy]
2. “How should we relate to the Buddha’s statement that sensual pleasure is to be feared?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Sensual desire] [Sense bases] [Fear] // [Culture/West] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy]
Sutta: MN 66.19: Sensual pleasure is to be feared.
5. “Did Ajahn Mahā Boowa always praise the dtuaṅga practices?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ascetic practices] [Ajahn Mahā Boowa] [Ajahn Mun] // [Qualities for non-decline]
Story: Ajahn Mun tells Ajahn Mahā Boowa to stop sweeping when he is sick with malaria. [Sickness] [Ardency] [Attachment to precepts and practices]
Story: Ajahn Mahā Boowa takes on the dtok bhat practice, but Ajahn Mun puts food in his bowl. Told by Ajahn Kaccāna. [Almsfood] [Conceit]
Story: Ajahn Pasanno meets a monk who didn’t need to sleep. [Devotion to wakefulness] [Sense restraint] [Concentration]
Story: Pa Auk Sayadaw didn’t sleep during a Rains Retreat. [Pa Auk Sayadaw]
2. “The citta is sometimes defined as pure awareness, and it being in the fourth khanda, but it sounds like here he’s talking about the activity of awareness?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Heart/mind] [Knowing itself] [Volitional formations] // [Rebirth]
Quote: “There is that which is beyond birth and death. And then you start asking, ‘Well, what is it and how is it? How should it be?’ It’s just the same as in the Sabbāsava Sutta (MN 2.7)...As soon as you get into conceiving, you’ve already started the process of dukkha.” [Unconditioned ] [Proliferation] [Conceit] [Suffering]
Follow-up: “So is it better to hear what he said and let it go when I notice awareness that’s good, but I don’t have to make anything out of it?”
Quote: “The investigation is not a conceiving. The best investigation is when the mind is exceedingly still and not conceiving, not creating concepts.” [Discernment] [Concentration]
Follow-up: “So is it a realizing, not a conceiving?” [Knowledge and vision] [Conceit]
3. “If you keep chipping away at a theme of contemplation, you keep doing it, doing it, and nothing is changing in your experience, at some stage you feel this isn’t working, do you just have to move on and try something else? Is it the case that you just have to try them all? No-one can tell you which is going to work for you?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Depression] [Recollection] // [Patience] [Spiritual friendship]
Story: Ajahn Wanchai has a spinal injury and is in chronic pain but doesn’t refer to himself. Told by Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Ñāṇiko. [Ajahn Wanchai] [Suffering] [Sickness] [Pain] [Conceit]
3. Reflection by Ajahn Yatiko: “Authenticity and Freedom”: Ajahn Yatiko reflects on his brother Glenn’s life, values, and suicide from the perspective of a “Siamese twin joined at the soul” and from the perspective of a Buddhist monk. Originally offered at Glenn’s memorial service on September 30, 2013, at Ascension Lutheran Church in Edmonton, this talk was replayed during the 2014 Upasika Day on Death and Dying. [Family] [Suicide] [Truth] [Liberation] [Death] // [Christianity] [Monastic life/Motivation] [Mental illness] [Idealism] [Spiritual search] [Judgementalism] [Impermanence] [Kamma]
4. “Thank you for your talk on mindfulness today—very helpful. I’ve been practicing for a long time (and have even had a few insights that made big impressions on me) and while my sila has definitely improved, my mindfulness is a priority and I might have a tad more wisdom, my mind looks for ways to suffer. Sometimes I feel like a total failure as a Buddhist. I understand that letting go of identity view is the answer, but how? What am I missing?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Long-term practice] [Suffering] [Perfectionism] [Self-identity view] // [Aggregates] [Relinquishment] [Drawbacks] [Gladdening the mind]
Sutta: SN 22.22: The Burden (Chanting Book translation)
7. “Thank you for these wonderful teachings. I understand that ‘citta’ is both the heart and mind but my felt experience is often so different. My mind is often crabby and critical and down right mean, at least to me, but my heart is soft and sweet and easily moved. In fact, my mind can make my heart cry! Please help with this dilemma. Much mettā.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Nature of mind] [Heart/mind] [Judgementalism]
17. “How does one work with ones own judgments that come up so often during the meditation practice? (They are mostly judgments of myself, for not getting there…)” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Judgementalism] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy]
6. “It seems that suffering in the lives of many people, my own included, comes from feeling unworthy or unlovable. Would you have any thoughts on why so many people feel that way and what will help to let go of this feeling? Thank you!” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy ] // [Culture/West] [Christianity] [Goodwill] [Competitiveness]
15. “Is the ego the same as self? If different, in what ways?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Self-identity view] [Western psychology] // [Conceit] [Volitional formations] [Conditionality] [Ignorance] [Cause of Suffering]
1. “Do you need to be a non-returner to be free from the fear of death?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Karuṇadhammo. [Non-return] [Fear] [Death] [Sensual desire] // [Arahant] [Conceit] [Stream entry] [Faith]
3. Readings from the Introduction to Listening to the Heart by Kittisaro and Ṭhānissarā (commercial). Read by Ajahn Pasanno. [Kittisaro]
Story: Kittisaro’s first meeting with Ajahn Chah. [Ajahn Chah] [Conceit] [Body scanning] [Humor]
Stories: The Squirrel Story and the Donkey Story. [Learning]
1. “Is it easy for a person with attainments to deal with the world?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Stages of awakening] [Everyday life] // [Discernment] [Conceit] [Culture/West] [Wrong concentration]
Quote: “To push away the world is also to reifying it. One gives it power when one is afraid of it.” [Craving not to become] [Proliferation] [Fear]
Laypeople with highly developed meditation practice function well in the world. Comment by Ajahn Ñāṇiko. [Lay life] [Meditation/Results] [Energy]
3. “How do you respond to the cynical inner voice when you recollect your own virtue?” Answered by Ajahn Karuṇadhammo and Ajahn Ṭhitapañño. [Recollection/Virtue ] [Judgementalism] // [Ajahn Sucitto] [Habits] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Culture/West] [Humor]
2. Discussion about kamma and the results of kamma. Led by Ajahn Karuṇadhammo, Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Ñāṇiko. [Kamma] [Conditionality] [Feeling] // [Abuse/violence] [Abhidhamma] [Ajahn Chah] [Vajrayāna] [Sickness] [Compassion] [Culture/India] [Equanimity] [Disasters] [Christianity]
Quote: “Too much Dhamma.” — Ajahn Buddhadāsa. Quoted by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Buddhadāsa]
Sutta: AN 4.77 Acinteyya: “Vexation or madness.”
Story: Ajahn Chah to Ajahn Munindo: “If it wasn’t supposed to be this way, it wouldn’t have been this way.” Told by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Munindo] [Self-pity]
Thai saying: “That’s as far as their merit takes them.” [Culture/Thailand] [Death] [Merit] [Thai]
10. “Any advice for cures for burnout? I’m in a helping profession and feel depleted and exhausted. I need help getting the balance between giving and receiving.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Depression] [Work] [Health] [Generosity] [Compassion ] // [Culture/West] [Idealism] [Commentaries] [Selfishness]
Quote: “Compassion in the English language means ‘to suffer with.’ If you end up suffering with too much, you end up burnt out.” [Language] [Suffering]
Quote: “Don’t think you’re a ten-wheeled dump truck when all you are is a wheelbarrow.” — Ajahn Chah [Ajahn Chah]
Commentary: Path of Purification by Bhikkhu Ñāṇamoli, p. 291: Classical cultivation of goodwill and compassion, first to yourself. [Goodwill]
Quote: “Our ability to be with others and to help and to give is dependent on our being kind and compassionate to ourselves.” [Spiritual friendship] [Self-reliance]
11. “Is sexuality and wanting an intimate connection with another considered a negative desire?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Sensual desire] [Relationships] [Desire] [Unskillful qualities] // [Food] [Clear comprehension] [Compassion] [Selfishness] [Discernment] [Precepts] [Trust]
Quote: “It’s not so much a matter of thwarting desire, but understanding how desire works so we can build those bonds of trust and care.”
3. “A lot of my life has been based on guilt, punishment, achievement, feeling driven, and perfectionism. Recently I experienced the reverse of this. Perfectionism is mixed up with wholesome desire. Could you respond?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Judgementalism] [Idealism] [Desire] [Contentment] // [Discernment] [Self-identity view] [Human]
Story: Ajahn Pasanno can’t translate the question ‘How do I work with guilt?’ into Thai. [Ajahn Paññānanda] [Ajahn Pasanno] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Language] [Culture/West] [Culture/Thailand] [Suffering]
2. “What did the Buddha think following his teachings should mean or entail?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Three Refuges] [Precepts] [Buddhist identity ] // [Virtue] [Lay life] [Five Precepts] [Faith] [Generosity] [Association with people of integrity] [Hearing the true Dhamma] [Learning] [Practicing in accordance with Dhamma] [Conceit]
Sutta: AN 8.26 Jīvaka Sutta
17. “What is the right point to drop or ignore the desire to identify with the Buddhist identity?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Karuṇadhammo. [Relinquishment] [Desire] [Self-identity view] [Buddhist identity] // [Suffering] [Perfectionism] [Clear comprehension] [Conventions] [Ajahn Chah] [Right Effort]
9. “What is the best approach to deal with guilt?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy ] // [Culture/West] [Conscience and prudence] [Learning] [Faith] [Discernment] [Self-identity view] [Not-self] [Aggregates]
Sutta: MN 22.58: “Whatever is not yours, abandon it.”
3. “You often talk about gladdening and lightening the mind. How do I do that?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Gladdening the mind ] // [Recollection] [Divine Abidings] [Empathetic joy] [Competitiveness] [Three Refuges] [Perception of light]
5. “Competitiveness feels so pervasive here in America. What are your thoughts for working with it or healing it?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Competitiveness ] [Culture/West] // [Suffering] [Self-identity view] [Relinquishment] [History/America] [Proliferation]
Reflection: The nine bases of conceit. [Conceit] [Competitiveness ]
3. “Could you talk a bit about the kilesas? How to see them clearly and work with them skillfully without falling into discouragement and self-judgment?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Unwholesome Roots ] [Right Effort] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] // [Mindfulness] [Discernment] [Recollection/Virtue] [Perception]
4. “I was wondering if the merit we have done for meditation practice can be dedicated to the people (dead or alive) we pray for? How do we know it? Also, I have heard that the merit from practicing meditation will accumulate and stay with ones who have practiced that, which also carries over throughout the life or the subsequent incarnations. Can you clarify this?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Merit] [Prayer] [Rebirth] // [Theravāda] [Mahāyāna] [Vajrayāna] [Science] [Faith] [Selfishness]
Stories told by Ajahn Paññānanda about dedication of merit. [Ajahn Paññānanda] [Culture/Thailand] [Superstition] [Death]
6. “If I remember correctly, you said with practice what can be realized is not so much the abandonment of the self but the misperception of a self given there has never been a self to be abandoned, correct?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Not-self] // [Clinging] [Doctrine-of-self clinging] [Self-identity view] [Aggregates]
Sutta: MN 72.15: I-making and my-making (aṅkārama-maṅkāra). [Conceit]
18. “I often feel overwhelmed with the greed, hatred, ill-will, and delusion that the corporate world exerts over the masses to the benefit of only themselves and that is destroying the planet’s ability to renew itself. Could you speak about Buddhist involvement in social change movements?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Politics and society] [Activism ] [Unwholesome Roots] [Commerce/economics] [Selfishness] [Environment] // [Truth] [Ajahn Pasanno] [Non-profit organizations]
Ajahn Pasanno reflects on the results of his efforts to preserve forests in Thailand. [Geography/Thailand] [Learning] [Greed] [Corruption]
Quote: “Can I set an example myself and can I help encourage other people who are interested?”
4. “In the West, we personalize every bit of suffering. Is it different in Thailand?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Karuṇadhammo. [Culture/West ] [Suffering] [Self-identity view] [Culture/Thailand] // [Language] [Liberation]
Story: Ajahn Pasanno can’t translate guilt into Thai. Told by Ajahn Pasanno. [Ajahn Pasanno] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Thai] [Translation]
Quote: “That’s really suffering. Tell them not to do that.” — Ajahn Paññānanda [Ajahn Paññānanda] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy]
Reference: Can’t We Talk about Something More Pleasant? by Roz Chast (commercial). [Ageing] [Sickness] [Parents] [Health care]
5. “In this sutta (AN 5.48), there’s the assumption that everyone has enemies. It’s making me a little paranoid.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Fear] [Sutta] [Human] // [Judgementalism]
3. Story: Once a junior monk approached Ajahn Chah and listed all Ajahn Chah’s faults. Ajahn Chah replied, “It’s a good thing you’re not looking for perfection in yourself!” Told by Ajahn Jotipālo. [Ajahn Chah] [Virtue] [Perfectionism]
4. Comment: When I hear the word “shame,” it’s.a cousin of guilt. But in this context (AN 7.6), it seems more acceptable. [Treasures] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Conscience and prudence]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Karuṇadhammo. [Language] [Christianity]
10. “Can you talk about working with the practice in what seems like perilous times?, e.g. the rise in overt expressions of hatred toward sectors of society and the associated change in national leadership? How does one cultivate equanimity while also not turning away?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Politics and society ] [Ill-will] [Equanimity ] // [Divine Abidings] [Goodwill] [Conflict] [Aversion] [Judgementalism] [King Rama IX]
Sutta: Dhp 5: Hatred is never overcome by hatred...
16. “During the Christmas holiday, I’m going to be spending some time with relatives who do not share my same political views. In the spirit of wanting to understand their views and wanting to heal the divide that exists in our country, I want to talk about the election with them. How do I have this conversation skillfully?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Family] [Politics and society ] [Right Speech ] // [Judgementalism] [Listening] [Human] [Sense restraint]
6. “Please talk about fixed views and the nine conceits.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Views ] [Conceit ] // [Pāli] [Proliferation ] [Craving] [Self-identity view] [Cessation of Suffering] [Competitiveness] [Culture/West]
Teaching: The three papañcadhammas. [Conceit ]
8. “Would you have some suggestions on working with shame? As an emotion, it feels very “sticky” and probably the hardest one for me to work with. It seems like it is deeply rooted in my mind (probably thanks to Christianity). Is it true that Thai people have an easier time with it than westerners? Is an antidote to shame self-compassion?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy ] [Culture/Thailand] [Culture/West] [Compassion] // [Goodwill] [Self-identity view] [Relinquishment]
5. “I am tangled up in self-identification and conceit. What should I do to get myself out?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Self-identity view ] [Conceit] // [Suffering] [Discernment] [Relinquishment] [Clinging]
5. Comment: I’ve discovered on this path that we can change, but sometimes we can not change, and it’s just accepting ourselves better and being more at ease in our bodies. [Eightfold Path] [Judgementalism] [Tranquility]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno and Ajahn Karuṇadhammo.
8. “All these practices [in MN 20] have been useful to calm the thoughts in the moment, but with ill-will and forgiveness, it hasn’t genuinely changed the underlying emotion. I thought I had forgiven somebody, but ill-will comes up towards that person six months later. When do you genuinely change the underlying emotion?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Calming meditation] [Ill-will] [Forgiveness] [Unwholesome Roots] // [Right Intention] [Conditionality] [Perfectionism]
9. Comment: It’s so hard not to identify with the contents of the mind, to not make it me and mine. Realizing how useless so many of my thoughts are helps. [Self-identity view] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Suffering] [Disenchantment] [Directed thought and evaluation]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno. [Mindfulness] [Pāli]
Response by Ajahn Karuṇadhammo. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Not-self] [Humility]
14. “What are the biggest misconceptions about being ordained?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Monastic life] // [Selfishness ]
Story: Ajahn Pasanno visits Ajahn Buddhadāsa: “Don’t be selfish!” [Ajahn Buddhadāsa] [Ajahn Pasanno] [Selfishness ]
1. “How does upatakhing fit into our training and what can we learn from it?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Upatakh] [Vinaya] [Respect for elders] [Monastic life] [Saṅgha] // [Culture/Thailand] [Conceit] [Generosity] [Protocols] [Discernment] [Mindfulness]
Vinaya: Cv 8: Vattakkhandhaka - Protocols
Story: Ajahn Lee upataks Ajahn Mun. [Ajahn Mun] [Ajahn Lee Dhammadharo]
16. “Can you speak about regret?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Conscience and prudence] [Restlessness and worry] // [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Determination] [Skillful qualities] [Culture/West] [Kamma] [Goodwill]
Story: Ajahn Pasanno can’t translate guilt into Thai. [Ajahn Pasanno] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Thai] [Suffering]
16. “These readings give the sense that the Northeastern Thai Isan culture is the soil that supports the living tradition. Are there cultural attitudes or ingredients that would be helpful for laypeople in addition to the key things of sīla and Right View?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Culture/Thailand] [Thai Forest Tradition] [Culture/West] [Virtue] [Right View] // [Generosity] [Meditation] [Precepts] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Happiness]
5. “Could you please address judgement and discernment?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Judgementalism] [Discernment ] // [Self-identity view] [Skillful qualities] [Four Noble Truths] [Culture/West] [Impermanence] [Conditionality]
3. “According to the first precept, how would you look at the case of abortion?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Killing] [Abortion] // [Vinaya] [Politics and society] [Judgementalism] [Health care]
9. “When strong feelings associated with conceit come, what to do?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Conceit] [Feeling] // [Noble Truth of Suffering] [Mindfulness of feeling] [Clear comprehension] [Nutriment] [Relinquishment] [Patience]
1. Comment to Ajahn Ñāṇiko: I really appreciate the honest of your sharing. In terms of self-criticism over the years, what brought about any shift was being authentic, but whilst I wanted not to be critical, it was still there. By watching that process and not identifying with it so much, it gradually shifted until I was able to wish myself well more genuinely. [Truth] [Judgementalism] [Long-term practice] [Direct experience] [Not-self] [Goodwill] // [Buddhist identity] [Faith]
Response by Ajahn Ñāṇiko.
4. “I thought to be self-critical was to improve yourself, to know how and where you need to improve yourself. How is being self-critical not good for yourself?” Answered by Ajahn Ñāṇiko. [Judgementalism] [Right Effort] // [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Energy] [Goodwill] [Idealism] [Unwholesome Roots]
Story: Eight months to Enlightenment. [Ajahn Ñāṇiko] [Abhayagiri] [Liberation]
5. Simile: Sculpting different materials requires different tools. This practice is more molding than hammering. [Similes] [Right Effort]
Response by Ajahn Ñāṇiko: Ajahn Amaro used to say, “The beatings won’t stop until morale improves.” At a certain point, you have to decide to stop. [Goodwill] [Ajahn Amaro] [Judgementalism] [Cessation]
3. “My natural tendency is to push the world away and to have the attitude that enjoyment is wrong. I’m working on trying to enjoy life. Do you have any ideas about this?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Craving not to become] [Christianity] [Hinduism] [Ascetic practices] [Happiness] [Skillful qualities] // [Monastic life] [Ajahn Sucitto] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Culture/West]
The Rule of St. Benedict and Ajahn Sucitto’s talk “Fellow Worms.” [Humility] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy]
Story: A BBC interviewer asks King Rama IX about original sin. [Media] [King Rama IX] [Culture/Thailand] [Nature of mind]
Causal processes leading to sāmadhi and dispassion have different starting points, but they all go through delight and happiness. [Conditionality] [Concentration] [Dispassion]
Quote: “Monks, do not be afraid of puñña.” — Iti 22 [Merit] [Fear] [Liberation]
Quote: “The happy mind is easily concentrated.”
5. “Can you say more about recollection of renunciation? How can this be used skillfully or not?” Answered by Ajahn Ñāṇiko. [Recollection/Generosity] [Renunciation] [Recollection] // [Contentment] [Self-pity] [Sickness] [Equanimity] [Buddha/Biography] [Fasting] [Devotion to wakefulness] [Lunar observance days] [Abhayagiri]
Recollection: Going without in the early days of Abhayagiri Monastery. [Almsfood]
8. Comment: Instead of thinking of one thing which I was having difficulty with, I brought to mind all the things that were working. [Directed thought and evaluation] [Appropriate attention] [Recollection]
Response by Ajahn Pasanno. [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Recollection/Virtue] [Faith]
2. “What advice do you have for students or graduates hoping to progess on the Noble Path towards Nibbāna while a student or in the workplace?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Eightfold Path] [Nibbāna] [Learning] [Work] [Lay life ] // [Human] [Discernment] [Compassion] [Generosity] [Perfectionism] [Desire] [Suffering] [Politics and society] [Simplicity] [Environment] [Depression] [Restlessness and worry] [Skillful qualities] [Community]
8. “You mentioned that ruminating on how one would like to change the world or the conditions around oneself can be a source of needless suffering. But there are times when one does want to work to change the world or the way society is organized for the sake of lovingkindness and alleviating suffering. How do we engage with those desire for change in a skillful way?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Politics and society] [Suffering] [Desire] [Goodwill] [Compassion] [Skillful qualities] [Activism] // [Conditionality] [Self-identity view] [Conflict] [Poverty] [Judgementalism] [Aversion] [Culture/Thailand] [Environment] [Idealism]
Quote: “If one is going to commit oneself to change, one has to get used to looking at things from a big perspective, a perspective of ‘How do we include rather than exclude?’” [Community]
Quote: “You want to approach a particular problem with an open a mind as possible and then see who might be willing and able to help.”
12. “What is the difference between emptiness, nothingness, and space? How can I use colors to develop the mind?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Emptiness] [Kasiṇa] // [Self-identity view] [Relinquishment] [Conceit] [Middle Path] [Etymology] [Not-self] [Elements] [Tranquility] [History/Early Buddhism] [Culture/West]
7. Reflection by Ajahn Pasanno: Abhayagiri: a place of safety. [Fear] [Abhayagiri] // [Pāli] [Realms of existence] [Culture/West] [Competitiveness] [Abuse/violence]
7. “I’m lucky not to have any obligations such as taking care of a family, making money, working, etc., but I don’t know what to do with my life....Always wondering what to do with my life is a bit tough. How would you suggest I approach the situation?...How do you figure out what to do with your life when you have too much freedom?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Purpose/meaning] [Work] // [Culture/West] [Right Effort] [Conceit] [Generosity]
See also Question 3 in this same session.
1. “What can I do to stop judging?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Judgementalism] // [Suffering] [Relinquishment]
5. “A sense of causeless joy permeates awareness, yet there remains a sense of me that experiences. How to dissolve that?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Happiness] [Knowing itself] [Conceit] // [Noble Truth of Suffering] [Suffering] [Relinquishment]
15. “You’ve lived a life dedicated to the spiritual quest of a Buddhist monk. What advice would you give to someone who’s starting out on the Eightfold Path and may have an interest in ordaining as a monk or nun?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Spiritual search ] [Monastic life] [Eightfold Path] [Monastic life/Motivation] [Ajahn Pasanno] // [Appropriate attention] [Culture/West] [Perfectionism] [Happiness] [Right Effort] [Patience]
19. “When one moves through the world with compassion and lovingkindness, how does one avoid feeling depleted? In a world of ‘individuals,’ most take more than they give and to always be giving can be exhausting.” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Compassion] [Goodwill] [Selfishness] [Generosity] [Depression] // [Not-self] [Four Noble Truths] [Cause of Suffering]
Quote: “When we are attentive to freedom from suffering, there’s an inexhaustible well of goodness there.” [Cessation of Suffering] [Skillful qualities]
5. “What would be your advice when young monks are wavering in their decsion?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Monastic life/Motivation ] [Doubt] // [Fear] [Guilt/shame/inadequacy] [Noble Truth of Suffering] [Ajahn Pasanno] [Delusion] [Continuity of mindfulness] [Mindfulness of body]
Recurrent refrain in the Suttas: “I know you, Māra,” e. g. SN 4.1, SN 4.5. [Māra] [Sutta] [Knowing itself]
1. “What should one consider when looking for a teacher or guru to guide one’s personal journey?” Answered by Ajahn Pasanno. [Teachers ] [Mentoring] [Discernment] // [Ajahn Chah] [Determination] [Truth] [Perfectionism] [Personality]
Quote: “I saw many people show up [at Wat Pah Pong] with their list of what they thought a perfect teacher should be....and they would leave.” [Perfectionism]
Quote: “It is only when we are willing to give ourselves to truth or reality that the teacher makes sense.”